My CAR has a LIFE of its own!

Really!

I can't believe how much trouble my CAR has managed to get into WITHOUT me!

First, it had an accident. A major accident- something like $5,000 worth of damage type of accident!!
(Which admittedly, isn't nearly as bad as you'd think, but still! The photo above shows some of the damage... Doesn't EVEN look like $5,000 worth, does it??)

It seems that my car was sitting in my driveway, minding its own business, one Sunday evening and then --BOOM!!-- an unlicensed teenage driver whose "UNCLE" was giving her a "driving" lesson (in a car neither one of them owned, don't you love that?) evidently hit the gas instead of the brake and proceeded to jump the curb and wedge their car in between my Envoy and a fairly new tree we had planted. Not satisfied with that level of damage, the car's occupants then decided they must ram their way OUT of being stuck between my tree and my Envoy... doing more damage on the way OUT than they did on the way IN! And THEN they TOOK OFF!

However, my very cool and alert neighbors took matters into their own hands (Did I mention that my neighbors are Superheroes?) and while one of them called the Police, the other one actually chased the offending car and told Police where to find them via cell phone. (The Police arrested the "UNCLE" on the spot and took him off to jail, I hear, and I don't know what happened to every one else -- including the car's lucky owner!)

And you know what? We missed all this fun! Entirely. Slept right through it all. (I told you we don't get enough sleep around here!) We never heard the collision (on our driveway) or the subsequent visits of the (Superhero) neighbors, to let us know what happened. (I guess I'll never convince anyone that I sleep lightly after this!) We didn't realize what had happened until Monday morning when I walked out to get in my car and go to work.... and tried to comprehend what I saw!??!!

Anyway- the Envoy is fixed now!... and so we assumed that it was just a really odd thing that happened, and it was all over... That is, until day before yesterday, when we opened the mail! It seems my car is in trouble AGAIN! This time it got a parking ticket IN LOS ANGELES! (That's a mere 200+ miles from where we live.) And WE were NOOO where NEAR LA on the date in question. So... how did the Envoy manage to get itself a parking ticket (an expensive $45 ticket, no less!) in LA??? hmmmm??? I never said it could go to LA without me!! (And the city of LA is totally impressed with my explanation that the car was NOT there to get a ticket!!!....)(NOT!)

OO KAY! -- That's it. We've had it. We were very understanding and supportive LAST time! We paid the car's deductible and had the damage fixed. But THIS TIME- that Envoy is GROUNDED!! And I think it should pay its OWN ticket, too!